Tunnel Vision

It is amazing how much time I spend thinking about TTC in general. I fell like I think about it all the time. I equate it to the stories you hear about men who think about sex. They are driving in the car and this is how the conversation in their head goes:

Sex, sex, sex, sex, right turn, sex, sex, sex, blinker off, sex, sex, sex, red light, sex, sex, sex, hit the brake, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, slow down more, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, come to a stop, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, waiting for the light to turn, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex,sex, sex, sex, sex, sex,sex, sex, sex, sex, sex,sex, sex, sex, sex, sex,sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, light turns green, hit the gas pedal, sex, sex, sex.....

I feel it consumes me every second of the day. Sometimes it is a passing thought, while at other times, I sneak a feel at my bbs to see if they are hurting, sore, or even just a little bit bigger.

I can honestly say once again I don't think I am pg this month. My temp dropped A LOT this morning. But I am ok with that. What is bugging me are these weird cramps I am having. They aren't really cramps. They aren't those twinges I had with my DS. I would swear they are gas pains, but alas, no gas in spite of the fact I have been eating veges like they are going out of style. These "cramps" move from my right side (near my ovary) to the center (where my uterus is). If I didn't know better, I might think I was pg. But I really don't think I am.

In about 5 days AF should be here. She will probably arrive just in time for my birthday and leave right before my annual appt. with my OBGYN. How nice, right?

Let me tell you how much I am looking forward to BCPs, too. YUCK!