The problem with time on your hands

A couple of weeks ago a friend of mine sent me an e-card. It was a very nice e-card. This friend has a knack of sending me these little cards when I need them the most.

In this e-card, it complemented T and me regarding this adoption. The e-card mentioned what a wonderful thing we are doing and how selfless adoption is.

I have been thinking about this ever since then.

Is adoption really selfless? Because I feel kind of selfish. I mean...we are adopting because we want another child. We are adopting because we have the means to do it.

Children from Vietnam are put up for adoption typically due to poverty. It isn't that the birthparents don't want their children...it is because they cannot provide for them. As a mom, I couldn't even think of giving a child up for adoption. The heartache....the pain.....I can only imagine what the birthparent(s) must have felt when they left their child.

So here T and I come along and take a child (wanted more than you could imagine) halfway around the world. More likely than not, this child will never be able to locate his/her birthparents. This child is being raised in a culture very different from the one he/she was born.

Is that really selfless? I don't know.

I do know we can provide a very loving and caring home. We can provide for another child (or two). We want to love another child.

I guess it is a matter of perspective. I do see both sides of the coin - the selfless side and the selfish side. Neither one is right. Neither one is wrong. It just is.

And this is the problem when the deadlines at work are being met and there isn't much I can do but wait for the home study interviews and Dr appts. - I have too much time on my hands!